If At First You Don’t Succeed…

April 01, 2016

Over the weekend, my youngest (he’s 14 now) built a computer all by himself. He saved up money from odd jobs and birthdays and bought a bunch of computer parts. Eventually, he had enough parts to build the computer and on his first attempt at turning it on, it didn’t work. He looked terribly defeated and thought he had completely messed it up.

I have some friends who work in the I.T. field and I was texting them to get thoughts on what was wrong. Everything they suggested appeared to be in good order. So he and I made a trip to the store where he purchased the parts and we were able to get a tech to look at his computer.

There was one very small connector that wasn’t fully engaged, and the problem was fixed within seconds! We took it home, fired up the computer and it worked!  But it didn’t have Internet access. To a kid who just built a gaming computer, that’s a deal breaker.

So we spent the next hour installing an updated operating system and working on his network connection to no avail. Once again, he looked defeated. I suggested that we step back for a minute, grab a bite to eat and think.

While we were having dinner, we started talking about the parts he bought and what each part was for. I asked the simple question “did you buy a wireless adapter or wireless card?” and he started hysterically laughing. We had just wasted time on a task that was NEVER going to be successful because we had no wireless network adapter.

So we went back to the store and spent $15 on a wireless card and once he installed it, the computer worked perfectly, even better than he expected. The look of happiness on his face when he was able to hit the “on” button and know that he took something from idea, to effort, to final product was pretty cool. He was very pleased and I was very proud.  There’s something about seeing someone reach a goal that is so very rewarding.

I saw the same look on someone’s face today. She and I have been meeting for about 5 years now on a yearly or sometimes quarterly basis. When we met the first time, she thought at age 50 that retiring at age 55 was a ridiculous and impossible goal. But she wanted to tackle it and if she “failed” in that goal, she’d at least be ahead of her current pace.

So she radically altered her lifestyle and started cooking more and going to restaurants less. She compromised and decided to buy only $14/bottle (or less) wine, as opposed to her $30-$40/bottle norm. She started using the “fluff” in her budget, which was now totally removed, to pay down debt and increase her 401(k) contributions. She got rid of her BMW 7-series lease and bought a nice, reliable, used Honda Accord.

Every quarter, we would meet again and go over her expenses and her debt reduction. On the annual reviews, we would do retirement projections and what started out as “You’ve got some SERIOUS work to do” projections turned into “You’re making some serious progress” conversations. The last two years have been “You’re almost on track” and “You could actually pull this off.” It won’t be the lifestyles of the rich and famous, but it will be a life that she would find enjoyable.

When we last ran her numbers, she realized that she could – if she wanted – walk into her manager’s office and call it a career. There would be not a lot of cushion or margin for error, and she may opt to work part-time or do some short term assignments, but she walked out of the office feeling confident that she had the capacity to retire. She isn’t making any quick decisions, and it might make sense to work a bit longer to build a bigger margin for error, but I wouldn’t be shocked if we have a conversation in the next month or two and she tells me that she is writing her letter of resignation.

My son’s first few attempts at turning the computer on turned out to be not so spectacular. My “frequent flyer” didn’t see success when we ran retirement numbers the first time. Neither one got discouraged. Both kept looking for ways to get closer to their goals.

What are your goals? Whether you’re looking to build a computer or make plans to retire earlier than you may think you’re capable of, don’t let the first attempt get you down. As you find yourself coming up short on a goal, which we all do periodically, go back to the beginning, remember why you set the goal and let that drive you toward your next attempt, which will inevitably be closer to success.