The Future Gift – One of the Secrets of Amazing People

September 15, 2015

Recently, I was talking to one of my fellow financial planners, Teig Stanley, about how his day was going. When he told me he was going to a funeral parade, I asked for more information since that is not a normal weekend activity. His comments about his friend who passed away, Manfred, and life in general were so thoughtful that I wanted to share it in his own words:

You’re going to hate me, but I’ve never seen the movie Pay It Forward. I know, I know. I’ve heard that it’s a great movie and everybody loves it so I’ll get to that as soon as I can, thank you. I know some things about it, and thought of it just now, so I had to write something of a corollary because of what a close and dear friend of mine asked me to do this weekend: I’m going to be leading his funeral parade.

Manfred didn’t know he was going to die when he did. It was way too early and unexpected. He was still a bright, energetic neighbor who had been a champion ski racer, accomplished engineer, devoted family man, and world class jazz musician who could have taught the world’s most interesting man a thing or two about humility. One of the things that made him so amazing at all these things and more was his ability to plan. While it was a pleasure to sing, drink, and tell stories with Manfred, asking his advice on a project of any kind was like talking to a fortune teller. He could see the future and know exactly what to do.

Years ago, according to his widow, my friend Manfred had decided that whenever he passed away, he wanted a New Orleans jazz-style funeral parade to celebrate his life instead of a traditional, somber funeral. He wanted his friends to play the kind of jazz he loved to play himself and to dance and sing and laugh and enjoy life the way he had when he was among the living. Although he died rather young and suddenly (aggressive cancer), everything was already planned out and funded in style. When his friends came together out of concern for how his wife and her home were going to be taken care of financially, we were not surprised when she told us Manfred had saved and invested in such a way that she didn’t have to worry about money for anything, ever. It was a gift to his beloved, and all of us too.

That reminded me of something my father did recently too. My father wanted to have his 60^th birthday party at the happiest place on earth: Disney World! He wanted his entire family to be there too, of course. Now, if you’ve not looked into the cost of visiting (much less staying at) a Disney resort recently, it’s a pretty expensive venture. For my parents, their four kids, and their grand kids to all fly to Orlando, help my dad blow out the candles, and have several days of fun was going to be a huge financial challenge for everyone.

That is when the financial magic happened so to speak: my father had decided to give himself a gift. He knew several years in advance that he really wanted to have a magical blowout of a time for his birthday so he decided exactly where, when, and how he wanted to celebrate. Only after that did he look at what that the celebration would cost (airfare, park tickets, hotel…you get the picture).

He then set up a separate account at the bank and every chance he got over the next five years, he gave himself the gift of a deposit into that account. Rather than upgrade his wardrobe or trade-in for a newer car during those years, the money that might have gone to those things went into it. Nobody else knew about the account, and he told me later how easy it was for him to do once he thought of it as his birthday present to himself.

That’s kind of brilliant, I thought. Who doesn’t like to give and receive gifts? The event was beyond anyone’s wildest dreams, really, and my father had actually over-saved to the point where he was able to upgrade his car last year too.

If I ever struggle with the discipline of saving up for things that seem so far off like retirement or my children’s college education or my 60^th birthday party, I’ll do what I’ve seen amazing people do and give a future gift in this way:

Have fun creating a really detailed vision of what I want in the future – the who, what, where, when, how, and why.
Think backward. After creating the vision, determine what it’s going to cost and then calculate how much to start saving.
Plan forward. Figure out the details like what kind of account would be best to use (e.g. company 401k for long term retirement, a 529 account for education ten years down the road, a savings account for a special wedding anniversary next year).
Treat every deposit into that account like a gift. It’s a happy occasion.
Use the gift! When the time comes, use the savings to come as close to that vision as possible.My father is of modest means, as was Manfred, and I learned something very important from both of them about how to live rich no matter what your income: save money like it’s a gift for the future.

My father is of modest means, as was Manfred, and I learned something very important from both of them about how to live rich no matter what your income: save money like it’s a gift for the future.